I got the invitation to my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary.

The math of a marriage:

7 children +2 adopted grandchildren (me and my brother Jesse) = 9 children.

12 grandchildren - 2 grandchildren that are legally thier own kids = 10 grandchildren.

6 moves (all in or around Chicago) + 1 new condo in Arizona = 6.5 houses.

7 children's marriges + 1 child currently engaged - 3 divorces = 4.5 children married.

18,250 nights sleeping in the same bed - 300 nights apart because of work travel, or Grandpa's snoring which got him sent to the spare bed in my room = 17,950 nights sleeping in the same bed.

2 rounds of golf a week x 9 months a year for 15 years = 1,080 round of golf together.

2 infectious senses of humor + 9 children = 9 comedians - 6 with better jobs - 1 in college = 2 poorly paid comedians (myself and Peggy, a stand up)

48 anniversaries in Chicago + 1 spent hiking through a dormant volcano = 1 hilariously ironic trip.

I called my Grandma a few days ago and left a message letting her know I wanted to find out how Grandpa proposed. She hasn't called me back.